I need to learn how to dream right, you know, dream proper, dream good. I could use a nightmare, or...

At the end, I want you to bang on shit. If you want to bang on shit before the end, that’s...

Balling's Slicery

“Why I do the way I do? It’s yo asphalt.”
— A Bankhead style rap (from Mr....

Ode to the Timpanee player

(for thou art a G) Is it just me or are you badass as a general rule? Among the orgy of orchestra,...

Happy birthday Carolina. You’re now one of my peeple....

Somewhere around the Eiffel Tower.(But I can get these in...

 EDIT: Why couldn’t it have been an Air Icelandic flight that was cancelled?

Its hard to be glamorous.

MAIN ENTRYCharacteroid [kar-ik-ter-oid]-adjective1. one who embodies character: That’s a...

Listen

Why yes, I do feel rather victorious. Its always nice to be a small, white Obama. P.S. The...

(Aniston ‘06) The ultimate of Valentine’s Day...

I just stole the first nine days of 1941. And I don’t feel too guilty about it. Actually,...

(Pride Parade ‘07) That’s pretty much going to...

The March of the Cupcakes. (A very ominous cupcake indeed.)

The Big Book of Don't Kill Yourself

Is little and blue and has a cupcake glued to one page. Because cupcakes tend to make people want to...

It is the resolution

to end all resolutions. Especially of the New Years variety. I resolve to put a shitload of effort...

“Mon petit chou! Votre Petit chou? Oui! Why can’t I be...”
— a dollar that doesn’t...

happy thanksgiving? definitely. collapsing is always a...